Cough Drops. Yum.

They're comfortable. Like the sun waking you up through the window in your room. And like being hugged by someone you love when you don't feel like yourself. Also like remembering who you where at the age of five, when you didn't care about money or college or your parent's flaws. You know what? It sucks to grow up. Around the age of 15, I started to notice things that weren't so nice about the people who'd always been my role models. My mom seemed less perfect and my dad seemed more sad. They're still exceptionally wonderful, but I feel like noticing that they're just humans messed me up a little bit. That lack of immortality makes them vulnerable, so what does it make you? They've protected you from everything since your birth, so the moment they become less secure, it feels like a monster has breached your security. That monster, of course, is reality. And it's hard to face. Most of the time, I feel like I'm either in this battle-to-the-death with it or it's my best friend and it's leading me through the rest of high school. Speaking of which, the rest of high school is absolutely depressing! The days feel twice as long, even though I get out earlier this semester. I've never had such a hard time sitting through a school day, but it all feels absolutely depressing in an unexpected way. I cannot wait for the day when my friends, my enemies, my acquaintances, total strangers and I throw our mortarboards up into the air and walk away from what very well may be the most difficult four years of my life thus far. College seems so close and so real all of the sudden, and I can almost touch it. I'm excited. I'm ready for it. My bright and promising future is trying to pull me out of high school, and I can't let it because of the remaining 12 or so weeks! Maybe it has already pulled me out and this weird feeling I'm feeling is the place in between being a stupid teenager and being an adult. At any rate, I feel out of place.